Let me spin you a tale of a glorious time in my life called “Senior year of high school” and a certain portion called “yearbook”. Working on a yearbook is basically the class where you combine both angsty and emotional teenagers with drama, page-making software and (in my case) lollipops.
Our story begins with the overworked yearbook photographer (me) discussing ways with classes editor (current ET news editor Dylan Chesser) to create visual interest while incorporating all of the classes equally. We came to the conclusion that having a border of students’ pictures would be an excellent way to achieve that. Our only problem was we didn’t have nearly enough photographs to line every page uniquely.
Determined to change this, I visited almost every classroom in all corners of the school to make up for this extreme drought of photographs. I quickly got over the annoyed glances from teachers and the shy, blushed faces from students.
I felt completely fulfilled, “I had done it”, I thought. I swaggered my way back up to the yearbook office to drop off these snapshots, so I could go back to eating lollipops and playing “World of Sand”. When Dylan got these, he loaded them all in… and it literally filled the bottom of two pages.
Heartbroken and slightly exhausted, I ponder about how in the world I was going to pull all of this ridiculousness together.
Then my mind floated to social media websites.
“HEY! I know…!” I said in a state of epiphany, “We can go on Facebook, look at all of our friends profile pictures, and SNAG them!” The logic behind this was obvious: people obviously wouldn’t mind their best picture being in the yearbook, in fact, they would love it!
As soon as I got home I began the compilation, saving every profile picture I saw onto my flash drive until it was bursting at the circuits. I marched into school the next day the king of the world. I felt like I had beat the system. I was so proud that I had avoided taking a seemingly infinite amount of photographs by doing it this way. I sighed a sigh of relief, and slyly enjoyed a lolli (again).
Now, fast-forward to the end of the year, all the yearbooks have been passed out as everyone laughs at their friend looks, I find myself in the office of the Principal. Needless to say, he didn’t take as kindly to my genius idea as I had.
“Whose idea were these Facebook pictures?” he exclaimed.
“Mine,” I said, solemnly taking the blame.
“You do realize that you can’t do this right?”
“Oh, no, I didn’t, actually…” I said obliviously even though I knew what I had done was wrong.
“Well, just don’t do anything like this again, we could have gotten into so much trouble. Just take the pictures next time, okay?”
I proceeded to walk out of the office feeling totally exposed, but I still felt like a winner. A completely lazy human being who deserved all kinds of punishment, but still a bonafide winner.
And that’s the reason I’m not allowed on Facebook ever again…
(not really but still.)